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8 Jan 2013

New Year 2013 News  

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Hi everyone, Honey Higginbotham here, Jude's PA / PR guru / flatterer / tea-maker /toe-nail polish applier updating you on recent news. As Jude has been laid low with viral meningitis for a couple of months I've had the run of the office and it's been fucking brilliant without her, parties every afternoon. But (unfortunately) she's back with us and working flat out again which means I've been nagged into writing this. Sigh. I'm on Facebook btw...

NEW YEAR 2013 NEWS:

COME DINE WITH ME, A BESTSELLER AND MORE NOVELS 


Every time Channel 4 or More 4 broadcast The Come Dine With Me which Jude won, Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law shoots straight back up into the Amazon erotica bestseller lists. This means that at all the dinner parties Jude gets invited to, she can now brag about being a best-selling author before farting and falling face-first into the cheesecake.



The title has now been signed up by leading erotica specialists, House Of Erotica and is now listed on Amazon as Cougar Erotica. Ooooh my word. You can buy it in paperback and as an e-book at many leading online retailers. LMGTFY. (Top right in HOE's current releases.)

Meanwhile, the editing on Drowning, the sequel to My Adventures in Cyberspace, continues. Rome wasn't built in a day and nor were Jude's semi-autobiographical novels. Drowning will be published by Fleur De Lys Publishing in Spring 2014 and there will be a book launch in Sheffield and possibly in London too. Watch this space...

House of Erotica (a subsidiary to the major publishers Andrews) have requested a sequel to Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law, and Jude is 10K into the writing of A Passion of Classic Cars featuring the same main characters from Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law. But who is shagging whom this time, hmmm? Again, watch this space. Jude hopes to complete the novel this summer ready for immediate publication.

Labrats is currently being edited and will be published sometime in 2014. So by the end of 2014 Jude will have five novels out. Not bad for someone to whom all and sundry were sneering "You'll never be a writer" only five short years ago...

"If you can't beat 'em, fuck 'em. Then beat 'em." ~ Jude Calvert-Toulmin


© Jude Calvert-Toulmin 2010

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3 Oct 2012

Jimmy Savile. Child rapist and psychopath  

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Even as a child, I refused to watch his programmes. To me, he was always a cold, sinister charlatan who was creepy around children. Long before I understood what paedophilia was, I knew that I wouldn't want to be left alone in a room with this man.

And that was just his body language. Then there's his appearance. Look at the picture above. If that doesn't scream "paedophile" at any normal woman I'd be very surprised (all, without exception, of the women I have spoken to about Savile have said "He gave me the creeps.")

And the cigar. Whenever he could, he was pictured with a full cigar sticking out of his mouth. What do you think that cigar represents? Um? A torpedo? A cucumber? A rolling pin? No, it represents an erect penis. It is Savile's way of mocking a world he has hoodwinked. He is saying "This is what I do. I'm a rapist. It's right in your faces and you're all too stupid to see it." By using that cigar as a continual metaphor he was laughing at us all. The shell suits were also a metaphor. They were his clown costume to make him seem like harmless, colourful, friendly Uncle Jimmy. One of his rape victims commented here that the elasticated waist of his shell suit made it easy for him to pull his pants down to rape her.

A few years ago, a close friend who himself had a degree of power on the club circuit in Leeds in the 60s told me that it was an open secret that Savile was a paedophile and therefore by definition, a rapist. And let's be clear about this. "Dirty old man" "Abuser" "Molester" all mean one thing. Rape.

Lots of people at his place of employment, the BBC, knew about Savile too. And they chose to keep quiet. Paul Gambaccini recently said in this article in The Independent:

"You just didn't mess with Jim. He was the governor, because after all he had been the first great club DJ, he had been the originator of Top of the Pops presentation, and you just let him have his turf."

You what? You just let him have his turf? What, you just let him carry on raping children because of your careers? What was Savile's "turf", Paul? Savile's "turf" was childrens' bodies. And you, and many others like you, let him rape with impunity because you were too scared to speak out. Having the courage to speak out now that big bad Jimmy can't get back at you is too fucking late.

And Esther Rantzen, quoted here in The Telegraph, now says:

 “We all blocked our ears to the gossip. In some way we colluded with him as a child abuser.”

You betcha Esther. As the founder of Childline why weren't you actively pursuing stopping Savile from his systematic raping of children over the decades? You of all people should not have been turning a blind eye. Anyone who turns a blind eye to child rape is in collusion with it.

Thank goodness that former detective Mark Williams-Thomas had the determination to make the documentary, The Other Side of Jimmy Savile, to be aired on ITV tonight as part of its Exposure series (11.10pm to 12.05pm.) Finally, five decades after the first allegations were being made about Savile, he's being exposed for what he was, a systematic and repeat-offending child rapist most of whose victims were too cowed by his power to speak out against him, and those that did were silenced, not believed, or packed off under a shroud of secrecy to have abortions.

Make no mistake, this man had power. He spent more than a decade having Christmas dinners with then prime minister Margaret Thatcher and her husband Dennis. You don't get much more access to power than that. And of course he was the BBC's golden goose with Top of The Pops and Jim'll Fix It and, as has been quoted, those working there were too scared to confront the open secret of his paedophilia.

Above: Savile at Haute de la Garenne

He has also now been accused of rape by a former resident of the notorious Haute de la Garenne children's home in Jersey, many of whose carers have been found guilty of child abuse for which they have received custodial sentences. He denied ever visiting Haute de la Garenne.

The onion skin layers of Savile's lifetime career of placing himself in jobs where he had control and power over children and then raping them are only just beginning to be peeled away. There could very well be hundreds of victims. By rights, he should have spent his life behind bars, not having royalty, politicians and the supposedly impartial BBC obsequiously toadying to him. 

How did he get away with it for all those years? He had worked his way into such a position of power through being a psychopath, that's how.  These are the boxes on Hare's psychopathy checklist which he ticks:

glib and superficial charm
grandiose (exaggeratedly high) estimation of self
need for stimulation
pathological lying
cunning and manipulativeness
lack of remorse or guilt
shallow affect (superficial emotional responsiveness)
callousness and lack of empathy
parasitic lifestyle
poor behavioral controls
sexual promiscuity
impulsivity
irresponsibility
failure to accept responsibility for own actions


Psychopaths use charm and empty, grandiose gesture as a smokescreen to disguise their cunning and manipulative quest for power over others. So skilled are they at doing this that most people in their lives have no idea they are gullible victims in the psychopath's widespread web of power. And those that suspect the psychopath of abuse of power, as can be seen from the examples of Esther and Paul above (who nonetheless should be applauded for having the humility to admit their errors and finally speak out when so many others are still remaining silent) are often too cowed and intimidated to speak out about it for fear of the retributions from the psychopath or those under his or her control.

Savile has also been accused of necrophilia. A habitual child rapist who spent days with his mother's corpse and volunteered to work as a hospital porter thus bringing him in the proximity of corpses, he also stated on Louis Theroux's 2000 documentary "When Louis met Jimmy" that he hated children and had no feelings for anyone. Witnesses to knowledge of his necrophilia will start crawling out of the woodwork in the future, mark my words. 




This is his headstone, at Woodlands Cemetery in Scarborough. I would not be sorry if it were defaced and smashed to smithereens although a broken stone will never equal him defacing and breaking countless lives. Defacing a gravestone is a criminal offence of course, but nothing compared to the offences Savile got away with in his lifetime. I also think he should be stripped of his knighthood. I've started the hashtag #stripsavileofknighthood on twitter this morning.

Cunt.





© Jude Calvert-Toulmin 2010

13 comments
5 Sep 2012

A Large Publisher, Capital Radio and A Passion for Classic Cars  

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I was approached by a large publisher recently asking to sign up my erotic best-seller Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law. I signed the contracts yesterday so in the not too distant future you'll be able to buy Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law not just from one e-retailer, Amazon, but from up to 200 e-retailers including Barnes and Noble, Tesco, Waterstones etc. This publisher will also be handling the paperback sales too so the paperback will be more widely available. The Kindle version is here in the UK or here outside the UK. 

In light of Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law's success, I've started writing a sequel with the working title of A Passion for Classic Cars which I'm aiming to finish by the end of October. The same cast of characters will feature, the voluptuous writer of crime-fiction, cougar Julia, her spoilt, obnoxious daughter Kate, Kate's ex-husband and Julia's lover, the gorgeous curly-haired young web designer Alex, Kate's new boyfriend, top model and down-to-earth Yorkshire lad Matt, and advertising exec Colin who is an absolute wanker (and great fun to write.) New major characters will appear in  A Passion for Classic Cars such as gorgeous blonde Sandi "with legs up to her tits" as Colin describes her, and the sultry dark-haired lesbian Christina. One chapter in, I'm already enjoying writing this as much as I enjoyed writing Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law.

In other news, I read from Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law live in front of several million listeners on Capital Breakfast, the biggest breakfast radio show in London, last week, hosted by the multi-talented Lisa Snowdon and her hilarious co-presenter Dave Berry.  You can hear my excerpt here:


It was great fun and I'd love to do more radio in the future :)

If you want to keep up to date with how A Passion for Classic Cars is going, you can do so by clicking like on the Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law Facebook fan page.

© Jude Calvert-Toulmin 2010

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22 Aug 2012

Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law, Come Dine With Me, Best-Seller and Fan Mail  

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After my Come Dine With Me was aired again last night which you can see again here, my erotic novel Mother-in-Law, Son-in-Law  (which is stacks better than Fifty Shades of Grey and here's why) once again went into the best-seller lists, not only in Amazon's erotica charts (#23 in Kindle, #34 in books) but also in all of Kindle, going in at 319!

As a result, I've spent this morning answering a wad of fan mail. Most of it was from former members of the Booker prize panel telling me how wonderfully erudite my prose is. Here's a sample of the rest of this morning's inbox:

(via Facebook fan page)

Antt: you are absolutley gorgeous, i wouldnt mind ravashing you in the kitchen x

Paul: So glad you won jude.but then was so gutted to find out you are wed.you seem like a very sexy woman.hope you forgive me for saying so.x

(via contact form on the Fleur De Lys website)


Andrew: Hi Jude, I saw your come dine with me episode earlier today, and I imagine you get this a lot, and I don\'t mean to sound too forward, but you really look stunning and I was wondering if you\'ve ever done any nude photography.

Thanks and sorry if this offended you, but you really do look amazing, and my lust forced me to contact you. Thanks again,
Andrew




Lads, I really appreciate your admiration but calm down! I'm 53 years old! I'm a granny! And I'm happily married to my toyboy Brian!



© Jude Calvert-Toulmin 2010

6 comments
25 Jul 2012

Sade and the Tiger in Exhibition and Instagram Filtermania Scenery Challenge  

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My portrait Sade and the Tiger is currently on exhibition at Gallery Different, 14 Percy Street, London W1T 1DR as part of the London Is Calling mixed media exhibition comprising various artists, sculptors and photographers including myself and Guy Portelli, with whom I was invited to exhibit at the Dragon's Den funded Pop Icons exhibition at the Mall Galleries in 2009.


In an entirely more underground arena, my composite pic of Fragonard's The Swing with the Filtermania iPhone app got through to the final 16 out of over 12,000 entries in their #filtermania2_scenery_challenge competition on Instagram. To vote for it,click the star button on the bottom toolbar of Instagram (which takes you to search users and hashtags), type in filtermania in the search box and then click on filtermania's homepage where at the time of writing, you'll see the above pic by juicy_jude. Please click like on it and say something nice about it if you've got time. 

If you're already registered with Instagram and on a laptop then you can go to the pic here on Extragram  and click the heart button to like it (not the Facebook like button.)

Naturally, as with everything I do, my piece has polarised opinion and, whilst most people love it, some people are already slagging it off.. To those who are criticising the picture for having no imagination, the first thing I do when constructing a filtermania pic is to *think*.  I blogged about how I construct filtermania pics here the other week.

The male and female protagonists of this very famous Fragonard painting, "The Swing", are separated by their emotional distance. They are only bridged by nature, which is why I wanted to make a composite with this particular countryside/bridge filter which not only highlights their emotional distance but is also visually very reminiscent of the Fragonard. To suggest it is plagiarism is simply missing the point of what Filtermania is all about. It is the visual equivalent of sampling in music, taking random images and making a tapestry of something new with the use of the filter. I am *hardly* about to attempt to pass off a Fragonard as my work am I?

The genius level on Instagram is still apparent in users such as Liz Freeman who posts as 88liz88 and Rinaldo Zoontjes as rinaldozoontjes but tediously lacking in some of the lazy posters on the comment trails. You can find me on Instagram as @juicy_jude or buy my instagram prints here.
       

©Liz Freeman

By the way, if anyone reading this knows Liz I'm actually quite worried about her. She's posted nearly every day since the early days of Instagram and a few months ago suddenly stopped posting. She's a restaurant manager on Queensland's Gold Coast and this is one of her shots of the view from the restaurant. Let me know if you know her, she really is such a wonderfully talented photographer and seems like a lovely person too, I'd love to know she's OK.

© Jude Calvert-Toulmin 2010

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